


No Denying It, So Beware

by haredevil



Category: PaRappa the Rapper
Genre: Dreams and Nightmares, F/F, Gen, Insecurity, Noodles, guru ant was just absorbed into the rappa family, think of him like a confused uncle
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-14
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-15 17:09:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,911
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29439501
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/haredevil/pseuds/haredevil
Summary: Whether he'd openly admit it or not, Guru Ant was struggling in his new life as a regularly-sized being. Parappa, the saint that he is, is strictly dedicated to helping him feel more like his confident, cool self.
Relationships: (Minor), Katy Kat/Lammy (PaRappa the Rapper)
Comments: 6
Kudos: 4





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! this is an as-of-yet unfinished story i started writing around summer of 2020 when i was having a parappa moment. although it still isn't finished, i'd really like to share what i have so far. it might motivate me to finish it!
> 
> i'll post a chapter every day or so, depending on whether i remember. i really hope you like it

“It doesn’t get better than this,” Guru Ant sighed to himself. It was a warm summer’s day in the Rappa house where he lived, and he had found himself a comfortable pile of laundry to lounge on near the open back door, so a gentle breeze blew through and over him. Beside him were several other ants, all napping comfortably like he had been. The house was overcome with a peaceful quiet, only the gentle hum of the TV in the other room. Usually it could get loud enough to feel like earthquakes, but it seemed like the Rappas weren’t home, so a bunch of ants had gotten together like usual to weigh the volume button down. They usually left the thing on for some reason. But it was fine. Everything was chill.

Guru Ant folded his upper arms behind his head and his lower arms rested on his belly, and he sighed again in total calm. His eyes began to shut, and he felt like he was just about to head off again when the pale light that was cast over him was suddenly blocked by something.

He cracked one eye open, squinting at the silhouette before him.

“My man!!” He exclaimed, sitting upright immediately, before remembering the others were sleeping and lowering his voice again, “Where have you been?”

The other ant shrugged, but with such a lack of worry or care on his shoulders that Guru Ant found he really didn’t mind either. Nobody really minded much.

“It doesn’t matter. I got something for you to see,” The ant replied, stretching out one of his several arms to help Guru Ant up.

The two ants descended the laundry pile together, making their way across the carpet to the back door. Guru Ant’s eyes followed the doorframe all the way up to the height of the ceiling. Why was he taking him to a dead end?

And when he looked down, he saw his friend, climbing up the doorstep and making his way out.

“Whoa, whoa, hey! What are you doing?” Guru Ant called out to him.

The other ant turned to him with that equally carefree air about him, crowned by light that made his face evermore impossible to see, but extremely familiar and homely nonetheless. “Trust me, dude.”

Of course, Guru Ant trusted him. He had an awful knot in his stomach, but he trusted him. He climbed up onto the doorframe with him, and when the other ant reached out for his hand, he took it without hesitation.

Carried along by the other, they both leapt down onto the pavement outside. The first thing he did was look up. Up at the massive trees, the gargantuan clouds, the monstrous birds — even at a distance, he knew those things were terrifying. Guru Ant found that his eyes began to dart around so rapidly he had to shut them to keep them from rolling out of his head.

The picture of relaxation, his friend chuckled at him. “It’s okay, man! Look at me.”

“I don’t want to,” Guru Ant immediately replied, his eyes screwed shut.

“Trust me!” The ant replied.

And with that, Guru Ant began to open the mental padlock he’d placed on his eyelids. He squinted at first, and then opened his eyes completely.

And suddenly, everything was wrong. Where was the other ant? He looked all around him, and the terrain started contorting — shrinking around him. Before he knew it, the trees were no larger than his hands, and were shrinking still. The clouds bloated and seemed so much closer. Too close. Guru Ant felt the knot in his stomach had become twice, thrice, maybe four times larger, and it was all so fast, but he couldn’t close his eyes anymore. They were forced open. 

“Where’d you go?! What’s goin’ on?!” Guru Ant exclaimed, and found that his voice shook the ground like any other giant would. In dawning horror, he looked down at the ground, at a tiny speck at his feet that used to be his home, that just kept shrinking and shrinking, before his vision was obscured by the clouds. He stooped down, trying to find the other ant, but before he knew it he was so far beyond the clouds that there was no hope.

Dismay washed over his face, and as sweat rolled down his back, and the knot in his stomach became the size of a mountain, he curled in on himself.

And an alarm blared.

Guru Ant jolted up in his hammock with a start, his eyes flicking around at his surroundings.

“Not the size of Jupiter,” He reassured himself, looking over his body. He was still his… new, regular size. He grimaced, but knew he was safe enough. After a few deep breaths, he rocked out of his hammock and stood upright. His eyes landed on the spot where he had just grown big, too big, and he did everything he could to look away. Forbidding himself to think about it anymore, he let his feet carry him into the house.

It was only when he felt the warm air of the indoor heating that he realised just how cold it was outside. It was turning fall now, just far in enough that the evenings were getting too chilly for outdoor naps. He breathed into his four hands and rubbed them together.

The TV was blaring loudly, and the sound was the first thing he noticed. He followed it to the living room, where he found Papa sitting on the couch with some new gizmo. Guru Ant approached hesitantly, skeptical of anything Papa PaRappa had in his hands. 

“Hey,” He said simply.

No reply for a good few seconds. And then it was like the presence of another clicked in the dog’s mind.

“Oh, hey, Guru Ant!” He gave him a quick smile, “Nice nap?”

“How’d you know I was napping?” Guru Ant sat next to him, but with a full person’s space between them, just in case.

“Well, you’re either here, or you’re napping somewhere else, and considering I didn’t sit on an ant when I came in, then….”

Guru Ant laughed sheepishly, “I guess so, man. I guess so.” He turned his focus to the TV, but his mind was barely on it. He seriously wasn’t used to this busybody culture, and it took him way too long to realise that only ever napping or watching TV was pretty ridiculous for someone his age and size. He looked up at the ceiling, and it was way too close.

Some noises came from beside him. Was that English? He conferred to verify it with a, “Huh?”

“I said, Parappa wanted to talk to you today,” Papa repeated himself, “I just remembered! With the aid of this new machine!”

“No kidding?” Guru Ant raised an eyebrow at the doohickey.

“Yeah! It’s my latest invention and it’s sure to be a breakthrough.” Papa held it up proudly for Guru Ant to soak in. It looked like a clock, kind of, but…. crazier. A crazy clock. A cuckoo clock.

“Uhhuh?” Guru Ant was trying to mask his natural fear of anything made by the guy.

“I really outsourced my inspiration on this one. I noticed that my boy has a lot of trouble remembering things in his daily life. Sometimes he even forgets to eat, can you believe it?”

Guru Ant suddenly became aware of his own hunger, but laughed along with Papa.

“So, I thought it’d be really helpful to make him a device that gives him reminders of what’ll happen where throughout the day, all on an easily portable device.”

Not just a calendar or notebook or something? Guru Ant kept that to himself. He supposed he didn’t really understand, considering he never had to remember anything and wasn’t really interested in remembering much new stuff nowadays.

“This right here is the prototype I just finished. I’ve been testing it out today.” Papa PaRappa finished his spiel.

Guru Ant smiled broadly, “Well, good goin’! Seems like it just worked pretty well.”

Papa PaRappa’s face twisted a little in confusion, before recognition dawned on it. “Oh, no! I was just thinking about him as I made it, since it’s for him, and seeing you reminded me.” 

Suddenly, the little weird clock chimed 6 PM — wait, it’s that late?— and a strange, robotic voice began to speak: “Remember to put the toothpaste in the microwave and water it at SEVEN!”

“What?” Guru Ant replied.

“Hey. It was supposed to say that AT seven.” Papa thought aloud with a frown.

Guru Ant smiled at him again. The whole fiasco can be pretty endearing, even if it unsettles him. “Guess it still needs some more work.” Papa went right back to having his nose stuffed into it as he had before.

Some time passed, and Guru Ant half watched some weird game show on the TV. After a short while, Papa got up to work in the kitchen instead for some reason, which was whatever. But abruptly, during the ad break, the front door flung open.

“Teacher!” Came that adorable voice, and soon after came Parappa himself, running back to the door to kick his shoes off, before leaping over the arm of the chair to sit beside him.

“Hey there, little man!” Guru Ant said, raising a fist to bump that was taken with great enthusiasm, “What’s the news?”

“I got something I wanna ask you! But first, lemme tell you, I was over at Sunny’s today. She was practicing baking again.” Guru Ant’s expression got a little more worried, and Parappa gave him an apologetic look as he handed over something fist-sized and wrapped in blue paper. “She wanted us to try it. I tried to help, I mean, I showed her one of Cheap Cheap‘s cookbook recipes, but uh….” 

Guru Ant carefully rotated the thing in his hand. At least the little girl was enthusiastic about stuff. She always tried her best. Just then, his stomach growled again, and instead of the usual preparation period he needed for trying Sunny’s cooking, he unwrapped it right away and shoved the whole thing in his mouth, much to Parappa's (and his own) surprise.

Oh, that was a mistake. But he kept chewing, looking over to see Parappa clearly holding in a laugh, and swallowed with great effort.

“Good stuff,” He finally said, after loudly clearing his throat. Parappa finally gave in and started laughing aloud at his teacher’s accidental goofiness.

“Oh, hey, Parappa! Hello, son!” Papa called from the kitchen, and Parappa instantly turned his attention to him.

“Hey dad! How’s it going?” Oh, so close. Guru Ant could already tell that Parappa’s brain had gone way off course from whatever he had to tell him.

“Come take a gander at this!” As he watched the boy go, he wondered when either of them would remember that he and Parappa apparently had something to discuss today.

It was about an hour later, after another show had just ended and Guru Ant was in the kitchen looking for more grub, that Parappa remembered. He peeked his head into the kitchen, and when he spotted Guru Ant, he approached boldly.

“Hey, teacher!” He said, sitting up on the kitchen table, something he could never do when Papa was around. Guru Ant could only muster a quick glance and nod to acknowledge him, as finding food weighed so heavily on his mind.

“What’s up?” He replied, finally landing on a packet of instant noodles, which he could practically feel Parappa frowning at. “Somethin’ to tell me?”

“Yeah, yeah! I was wondering, um… are you…” Parappa struggled to find the words, “Fine?”

Guru Ant lifted his head from the cupboard, holding a pot and a jug. “Am I fine?” When Parappa just looked at him, he jokingly answered, “Damn right I am, I’m the finest there is.” He filled the jug with hot water, poured it into the pot, and put it on the heat. Parappa snickered, but remembered he was trying to be serious.

“I mean, like… you’re okay?” He asked, and that made Guru Ant pause for a moment. He looked over at Parappa but couldn’t really glean anything from his face. 

He turned back to the pot, definitely not due to insecurity, and in fact because the pot was boiling and it was time to add the noodles. “I guess so. I mean, I feel alright.”

There was an uncomfortable pause as Guru Ant hoped Parappa would speak. He was met with silence.

“I guess I could feel better.”

“Whaddya mean?” Parappa finally asked. Guru Ant idly fiddled with one of his lower sleeves. He had only really known Parappa for about a month, before that only knowing him as a safety hazard. Sure, he’d seen the boy grow up, but they’d only gotten to actually know each other that summer. Plus, he was a kid, really. Guru Ant wasn’t sure he’d understand the problem he was having. 

But then, in the silence, Parappa spoke again, “I was talking about it with Lammy, my friend Lammy— she was there when we met, remember?”

“Uh, vaguely.” Guru Ant replied, keeping up a cool facade. He kind of had a lot on his plate at the time, but he did seem to recall a lamb there in a red shirt.

Parappa nodded, “She’s really cool at the guitar, and has awesome hair, and a nice voice? Well, we talked about you a little. Not in a bad way! But the fact that you don’t really… do much. Of anything. And you seem kinda sad, or distracted or something. No offence.”

Guru Ant turned to Parappa directly, only one hand seeing to a spoon in the bowl while another hand dropped a flavour packet in the trash. “Much offence. I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he said flatly, trying so hard to be opaque. Man, if a kid could tell how much he had split at the seams, he was really in it deep.

Parappa frowned at his response, “Talk to me, teacher!” 

With a quiet solemnity, Guru Ant elected to concern himself entirely with the noodles. “You… you wouldn’t understand, kid.”

Something about that remark set Parappa off, and his reply was an invigorated, “Try me.”

Guru Ant turned the heat off and poured the cooked noodles into a bowl, grabbing a pair of chopsticks. When he turned to Parappa, he was patting the dining chair next to him expectantly. Guru Ant looked at his face, and he saw raw determination, vigor, but… mostly, he saw care. Parappa’s intentions were golden as ever, but that knot in his stomach was starting to grow again.

Hesitantly, he took the seat, and when Parappa continued to watch him, he found himself playing a little with his food. “Uh, well…”

He paused for a long moment. He was sure that to Parappa, it looked like he was deep in thought, but really he was just zoning out. “Um…”

“Take your time, teach.” Parappa said.

“Wow, you’re feeling pretty mature, huh?” Guru Ant said, with genuine admiration. Parappa looked full of pride, but didn’t say anything. “I guess, uh… I’m just having trouble acclimating to your…lifestyle? Culture?” Guru Ant spoke so tentatively, like he was crossing a rickety old bridge. Parappa hummed in thought, but couldn’t think quietly for long.

“It’s hard getting used to new stuff sometimes, like, sometimes, one of my teachers will do a totally new rhythm that I’m not used to.” Parappa started. He thought this was on the level of him learning some new rhymes?

Although, he is a kid. Being a kid is pretty easy, he thinks. “But I let them guide me, and help me out, and then once I feel the flow and get to freestyling, it’s all me! And it’s cool and fun, and I get to impress Sunny with it.”

Huh. Guru Ant doesn’t reply, but he instead focusses back on swirling his noodles around. Parappa pointedly does not look at or acknowledge them. Guru Ant always found that entertaining.

“I think, teacher, that maybe you might also need a teacher, to help you out?” Parappa had a tint of hopefulness to his words, and Guru Ant realised his reply couldn’t just be poking at noodles this time. 

“Uh… What exactly did you have in mind?” He asked, and was pretty sure at this point his anxiety was showing through. But there was no denying it, really. He had begun to get the feeling Parappa knew what was up without him going into any more detail.

Parappa’s ears lifted up a little in excitement. “Well, I mentioned Lammy, right? I could introduce you to her! I think she would understand you a lot.”

“And Lammy’s…” Guru Ant frowned, “A kid, yeah?”

“No way! She’s totally an adult. She’s in college.”

“That meaning…?”

“She’s, like, eighteen… I think…” 

“Dude…” He leaned back in his chair and stared at the ceiling. “I’m not about to be coddled by kids.”

Parappa deflated a little. “Well she’s older than me. But it’s not like that anyways!” He responded, “You can just talk to each other, and maybe it’ll help you out. Isn’t it worth a try? Whaddya say?”

Guru Ant’s head rolled lazily to look over at Parappa, but his pleading expression made Guru Ant sit upright again. There was such a desperate willingness to help. Even though really, Parappa barely knew him, he was truly giving Guru Ant his 100%. The depth of Parappa’s pride and faith in others always hit Guru Ant like a ton of bricks. He really believed in him.

That was his saying, wasn’t it?

Oh, crap. He hadn’t replied.

“Um…” Guru Ant gave him a hesitant thumbs up, and what was hopefully a very cool expression, “You gotta believe?” He watched the kid’s eyes light up like stars as he spoke, his mouth opening into a wide grin.

“EXACTLY!” He exclaimed, “You got it, teacher! This is gonna be awesome!” Guru Ant watched with a smile as Parappa began punching and chopping the air in excitement. Weird, but he understood it. He couldn’t deny that the boy’s excitement was rubbing off on him.

Later that night, once everyone had said their goodnights, Guru Ant lay lounging on the couch. The TV was on, but the sound was muted, leaving the screen to cast a soft blue glow across the room and onto his side as he stared at the ceiling.

He’d been emotionally vulnerable enough today. He wasn’t about to admit that he rarely slept in his “bedroom” in the garage because he was afraid of the dark. He just admired the blue light. It was soft and cool and effortless.

He scratched his belly. It just meant he’d have to move to the hammock or something when the others woke up. Although it was getting chilly outside… maybe he could nab Pinto’s bedroom since she was sleeping over her friends’ house for a few days.

Wait, no. Her bed was way too small. And he was way too big.

Too big. 

He sighed.

When he looked over at the TV, silent footage played of clouds drifting lazily across a pale, blue sky. Papa’s newest invention, placed to the side, shone in the pale blue light. It was 3 AM. 

He closed his eyes.


	2. Chapter 2

“Teacher! Teacher!” Came Parappa’s voice, and Guru Ant replied with a sharp and attentive ‘Wmmbmmb.’ He rose groggily from the dent he had left on the couch, and his immediate concern was what time it was.

“You’re awake! Great. ‘Cause we gotta GO!” Parappa gestured to the door somewhat frantically. 

“Woah, woah. What’s the rush?” Guru Ant leaned back from the pulling force of Parappa gripping his sleeve.

“It’s 2 o’clock!” He glanced over at the gizmo. So it was. Parappa seemed to figure from his listless expression that the time meant nothing to him. “Did you forget?” Guru Ant thought hard for a moment. He had a very vague disjointed memory of Parappa talking to him between naps, but not really any of what it was about.

“Don’t matter. Let’s go! C’mon!” Parappa began to pull his teacher out the door, while Guru Ant hurriedly straightened his hat with one of his spare arms.

On the way there, Parappa began to give Guru Ant a quick briefing on this stranger.

“What you gotta know about Lammy, is that even though she’s an awesome performer, she’s pretty awkward and nervous. Especially around new people. But! She’s comfortable with me, mostly, so I think we’re cool. We’ve played live performances together before!”

Guru Ant seemed to recall the poster Parappa had hung up on his bedroom wall. “Oh, yeah. MilkCan, right?”

“Uhhuh! She’s the guitarist.” Guru Ant hummed at that, his eyes trailing to the sidewalk and following the cracks as he stepped over them. Being big when you used to be small leads to a painful awareness of how many bugs you could step on. Parappa had been walking backwards in front of him at first, but began to slow down enough to walk beside him.

“She’s a really cool cat. Well, she’s a lamb, but you get what I mean. Her partner is actually a cat, though. And she’s also super cool!” Parappa went on. At that point, Guru Ant honestly began to tune him out. Not intentionally, but just because he was feeling a little out of his depth. He was pulled from his daze when Parappa grabbed him by the wrist and loudly announced, “We’re here!”

He wasn’t really sure what he was supposed to be looking forward to when they stopped outside Chunky Burger. Diners meant social gatherings meant people. And he sure wasn’t a coward, but he felt aggressively out of place, like a cat among dogs, or a black sheep in a white flock, or—

“Hey Lammy!” Parappa called out, guiding Guru Ant along with him to a table by the window. _Here we go..._

The lamb lifted her head from the menu she was scouring over (or moreso hiding behind) to look at her friend. “Hey, Parappa! A-and uh…” Guru Ant put on his friendliest-yet-chill-and-unfazed smile he could muster in that moment, “H-hi, um…”

“Guru Ant,” he finished her off. Parappa slid across the diner chair to sit by the window, and Guru Ant followed suit with far less alacrity, “Parappa was telling me all about you on the way here.”

“O-oh, he was…?”

The trio began to get immersed in some friendly chat. Guru Ant was pleasantly surprised to find that Lammy was actually really mature and nice to talk to. She took some egging on by Parappa, but Guru Ant was catching her vibe. Parappa found himself some real good company. It made him smile. Things were going pretty smoothly until Parappa started bringing up the whole Situation. He didn’t bring it up with any level of subtlety; he asked Lammy earnestly if she remembered the thing he told her over the phone earlier. Guru Ant couldn’t get mad at the kid for trying to help him out, even if it did feel like it was out of left field. He was honestly impressed at the amount of care Parappa was putting into remembering things for him.

“Oh, yeah! I-I remember. I was thinking about it when you guys came in.” Guru Ant sunk into the diner chair a little, picking fries at arm’s length from his plate. “How I could help, I mean… I-I’m not really good at general advice, but I also talked to Ma-san a little earlier too, and she’s… she’s good at the no-nonsense stuff…”

Guru Ant noticed she seemed to be rambling a little bit, like she was scared of actually giving any aid. Spiels seemed like something she and the Rappas had in common. He smiled inwardly at the observation.

“A-and well, I know when I’m worried, or, struggling with something, it helps to imagine playing my guitar.” Okay. What?

“Uhhuh?” Guru Ant leaned forward a little, purely out of incredulity. 

Lammy began to mimic holding her guitar as she spoke, “Yeah, because I’m most confident when I’ve got my guitar in my hands. It makes me feel like I-I’m in control… if t-that makes sense.” Parappa was nodding sagely beside him, although whether he related to that at all was a good question. He was also chewing on what looked like a really delicious burger, so maybe it was just him nodding at that good flavour. 

Guru Ant was kind of hoping his skepticism wasn’t transparent. He gathered that she was pretty sensitive. “Can’t say I relate to that, kid.” He went to take a sip of the drink he ordered, only to nearly spit out the fizzy liquid. He was sure he ordered it with water, but whatever. He pushed it forward and away.

Meanwhile, Lammy blustered a bit, “Oh, well, yeah, I mean— do you have anything that makes you feel calm and i-in control?”

Guru Ant thought back to the doorstep, and his dream the evening before, and the times where he used to simply be calm and in control without even trying. He sighed, “Bein’ small, I guess, but I don’t have that any more.”

“Being small?” Lammy raised an eyebrow as she sipped on her milkshake.

Parappa quickly gulped his food and interjected, “Yeah, yeah! Like when we first met, you were so calm and cool, I thought you were awesome.” The phrasing didn’t escape Guru Ant, and he deflated enough that Parappa immediately noticed and back-pedalled. “I still think you’re awesome, though!”

Guru Ant waved a hand dismissively, “Nah, nah. It’s cool. I get it.” 

“I-I think what Parappa is trying to say, is, he wishes you still felt that c-confident, right?” Lammy suggested, and Parappa nodded fiercely.

Guru Ant grimaced. “Yeah…”

His eyes drifted away as his brain checked out, but he noticed to the side that Lammy and Parappa seemed to be having some kind of conversation. It wasn’t until a few moments later that Parappa caught Guru Ant’s attention again with a question.

“Teacher, what’s up with your drink?”

“Huh?” Guru Ant turned back to him, “Oh, yeah, man. It’s fizzy. ‘Sfine though.”

“You should go tell them!” Parappa encouraged him. Guru Ant gave a noncommittal shrug in reply, taking a bite of another fry.

“It’s no big deal.”

“Mr. Teacher, uh, G-Guru Ant,” Lammy interjected, poking her straw in and out of her cup, “Can you d-do something for me?”

Guru Ant turned his attention away from how not thirsty he was, “Yeah?”

“Close your eyes?” She said innocently, and although hesitant, he complied quickly enough. “Okay… now, d-deep breaths, and imagine, that you’re shrinking down again. B-back to your normal size.”

Guru Ant didn’t consider himself quite the imaginative type. But the sensation of growing and shrinking so rapidly had imprinted itself into his mind, probably forever — and so the sensation of returning to his normal size, of being back at the reins, came easily to him. As he shrank in his mind, the sounds of reality around him began to change — as though they were bigger, louder, and safer. The hum of cooking and customers sealed itself safely behind the crackling filter of a TV, and he was home. He was as small as a pea and with the confidence of a true teacher once again. He was himself. He exhaled deeply.

“Okay… open up!” Lammy said, and Guru Ant looked at her with a calmness he hadn’t felt in a good while. Judging from her expression, and the barely bottled excitement of the kid next to him, he was looking pretty damn cool right then.

A waitress walked by, and without hesitation, he requested a replacement for his drink and another bowl of fries for the table.

“Thanks, ma’am,” He called after her with a warm, yet oh-so-cool voice.

“Teacher! It worked!!” Parappa punched the air startlingly close to Guru Ant’s face in excitement -- to which he simply leaned back a little -- and went to give Lammy a high five. She grinned at the two of them.

Hey, yeah! This was cool. He could just imagine everyone was small with him, instead of him being big with everyone. He turned to Lammy particularly, and said, “Hey, little lady. That was some really mature advice. You’re a good friend.” She blushed a little at that, and hid behind her cup.

“Thank you!” She replied, awkward but genuine. That seemed to sum her up nicely.

Right at that moment, the doors to Chunky Burger swung open, and in came someone else that seemed vaguely familiar to him. A bright blue cat with blonde hair and a red and white stripy outfit. She was carrying more shopping bags than he thought he could carry with double the amount of arms.

“KATY!” Parappa exclaimed, waving to catch her attention. She looked over and smiled, but as soon as she saw Lammy, she started barrelling over towards them. So this was Katy Kat. Guru Ant could imagine how frightening it was to be an ant living here.

“Lammy! Parappa!” She greeted them both, throwing herself onto the seat next to Lammy and dumping her bags beneath the table, “Groovy! I wasn’t sure if y’all would still be here!” She gave Lammy a loud kiss on the cheek, causing her to turn tomato red, and gave Parappa a wink. Then, her attention turned to Guru Ant, and while her face went flat in confusion for a moment, she immediately returned to her upbeat attitude. “And who’s the big guy?”

She definitely meant big in a purely relative manner. Everyone was small.

“Teacher, introduce yourself!” Parappa urged him, and Guru Ant did so casually.

“WHOA,” came the immediate response.

“Huh?” Guru Ant replied.

“Your VOICE!” Katy exclaimed, “It’s so smooth! Like butter! My god!” Guru Ant’s eyes trailed away outside the window, and he mumbled a response that he hoped sounded appreciative. He felt a little humbled by the singer. He had heard her voice before from Parappa’s records; she was no joke. “Seriously! Do you do radio hostin’ or something? I swear I’ve heard that iconic voice before!”

He felt strange in that moment. Known yet unknown. She had remembered his voice, but not himself? He guessed it stung a little. She must’ve been there when he became big.

“Woah, hey, yeah!” Parappa said, “Teacher, you’ve totally got the voice for a radio host or somethin’!”

Guru Ant felt himself falter a bit, “Well, uh, I dunno…” His eyes darted around between the three of them. It sounded nice, sure, but he’d really be putting himself out there. In a town where nobody knew his name.

“That’s kind of a big move. I don’t think I’m… ready for that.”

Katy Kat shrugged, but continued to grin at him, “If you’re ever interested in presentin’ for someone… come find me!” Guru Ant put that way way at the back of his mind, and filed it deep in the folders of Things He Wasn’t Big About, but smiled and nodded out of courtesy.

The four of them stayed at it for a good long while in that diner, until they had lingered long enough to be asked to leave, and instead started wandering around the streets chatting. Well, mostly, it was Guru Ant watching the other three, but they made sure not to forget about him, and he found it was pretty easy to keep his cool when he was absorbed in a good atmosphere like the one they provided. The kids were alright.

It was turning towards evening now, probably around five or six, and the lowering sun cast the sky in a softer, dimmer array of colours. It was coming up to be Guru Ant’s favourite time of day. He never expected himself to feel so in-control out in the open, without rocks and grass to shelter him, but he felt totally fine. He wasn’t even thinking about where he stepped, choosing instead to watch the clouds as he walked. Everything felt a lot easier then.

Until he heard a crunch.

He stopped in place, causing the other three to dwindle back and watch him. He lifted the sole of his foot to see what the sound was.

He had stepped on a little snail.

~~~

Parappa had found that getting back Guru Ant’s good mood beyond that point was impossible, at least for him. So that night Guru Ant was left to his own devices, which were decidely going to be Moping and Sulking, by a guilty Parappa with an impending bedtime. And so, that night, Guru Ant found his eyes glued to the floor. Whether it was due to his mood or what had happened earlier that day wasn’t up to him. 

His mistake felt like the end of the world. He had known one or two snails when he was small. Not personally, or anything, since indoors was too dry for them, and they only came out when it was moist. But still...

Stepping on a bug is a pretty big deal when you are one.

But…

Something wasn’t sitting right with him. He thought back to Parappa and his friends, and then Sunny Funny’s baking blunders.

“Man,” Guru Ant said to himself out loud. He shouldn’t be moping like this. He made a real blunder, but being like this… it wasn’t helping anybody. Every week Sunny Funny tried to bake, and every week she messed up in some grand way. But she didn’t let it get to her nearly as much. She just tried to learn and keep going. And Guru Ant could say with certainty that her food was getting less unbearable by the week. You gotta learn and move on. That’s what he should be getting from this.

He finally looked up from his feet.

Immediately, he kind of noticed that the house was in a state. He didn’t know much about dusting, and from the looks of the ceiling, only the little kids had any interest in doing it. That was cute.

He spent a good while dusting the ceilings and the lighting fixtures, portraits and photos on the walls, and the space above cabinets and shelves, until the house looked presentable enough in the evening light. He smiled in satisfaction at a job well done, and thought about how much more tedious things must be without four arms for four dusters.

The ant was feeling pretty motivated. His eyes locked onto their next target: the pile of finished laundry near the dryer. Sorting them out sure wouldn’t hurt anyone.

But while he was moving laundry, something small glinted in the corner of his eye.

He ducked down towards the skirting board in the corner, where the laundry pile had just been, and picked the shiny thing up. He recognised it immediately.

It was his coin!

He rolled it around his fingers. Man, was it tiny. The reminder of his size was unsavoury, but he forbade himself to be so negative. He instead remembered when this single coin meant he was set for life; he had it all when he had this thing.

And now it wasn’t even enough to buy a drink. He couldn’t help but laugh a little. For a lack of pockets, he placed the coin safely under his hat. 

Big society is a mad, wild thing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey, thank you to people leaving kudos and comments on this so far! i'm sorry for the huge gap between uploading the first chapter and this one. i've been really distracted by other things lately.
> 
> hope y'all enjoyed this one!


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